The Lies Start as Soon as the Phone Rings

Our generation spends about 43 days of our lives on hold. Executive after executive at your favorite brand promises to “improve the customer experience” only to add technology you didn’t ask for to customer service. Sometimes it’s not all bad. It’s not what you asked for but will maybe mollify you. Most times, it makes things worse.

How come every insurance company has an ad stating they’re cheaper than their competition? It is impossible for that to be true, it’s no wonder why, like every other institution, we no longer trust companies. The promises just get grander, raising the customers’ expectations, but in the end, Customer Service is getting fewer investments per customer. The lies start as soon as you have a problem and need customer service. You call a 1-800 #, and it starts with “please listen carefully, our menu has recently changed.” It hasn’t. “We will be with you shortly.” They won’t. “Your call is very important to us.” It isn’t. If it was important to them, they’d be talking to you right now. “Your call will be answered in the order it was received” is also a lie. There’s a logic that gives priority to different people. Even the sacred “Your call may be recorded for quality and training purposes” now sounds sarcastic. What training and what quality are you receiving in exchange for passive consent to your call being recorded? It’s being recorded for their benefit, not ours.

The teller at the checkout line tells you to give her your email to send you a receipt. Before long, you have 50 emails with coupons you don’t need, and now you need to click a tiny text at the bottom of the email to make it stop. The lies are early and often. It’s time we have an honest relationship, one where the gap between expectations and reality is reduced.

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